Dealing With Leaders

Life is full of leaders who bear the weight of caring for others. Managers, pastors, parents, and governors can uplift or hinder us. So, when our leaders fall short, what guidance does the Bible offer on how to respond?

Growing up in the Evangelical Lutheran Church of America, I witnessed a division that shook my world. It was all about the ordination of homosexual ministers, causing a rupture within my church community. From that moment on, I became a skeptical leader-seeker, scrutinizing congregations for imperfections while vowing not to be hurt again. Many parents can relate; when wounded by our parents, we instinctively become cautious, promising to raise our children differently.

The Bible warns us about bad shepherds who are more concerned with their interests than those of their flock (John 10:12). Jesus also spoke out against religious leaders who want to be viewed as someone important rather than humbly serve (Mark 12:38-40). We should look for genuine leadership qualities in our pastors, parents, and mentors that reflect a heart for others rather than selfish ambition.

The Bible also provides guidance on how to handle unscrupulous leaders. In 1 Corinthians 5:11, Paul advises us to avoid associating with individuals who profess faith but engage in immoral behavior, including false teachers and pastors who contradict the teachings of the gospel. While we should pray for them, it is important to maintain a certain distance. The potential risks of being led astray are not worth it. Throughout the Bible, we encounter examples of bad leaders, serving as a reminder that we should not allow ourselves to be swayed by unjust leaders to the extent that we disregard God's guidance. He will always lead us in the right direction (Psalm 25:4-5).

Our small group, which focuses on digging deep and discovering biblical principles, explores how our shared experiences shape how we interpret scripture. This idea suggests that we often unintentionally filter our understanding of scripture through the lens of our own stories rather than allowing scripture to challenge and reshape our perspectives.

In this week's sermon series on Hebrews, we explored the exhortation in Chapter 13, Verse 17: "Obey and submit to your leaders, for they watch over your souls and will be held accountable. Let them fulfill their duties with joy, not with groaning, as it benefits you." So, how can we apply this scripture when we feel uncertain or frustrated with a leader?  

1. Challenge Framework: The Scriptures challenge our framework by emphasizing the importance of guarding against false teachers. The Bible consistently directs us to view God's word as the foundation for discernment. Hebrews 4:12 describes the word of God as "living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart." When we've been hurt or experienced past betrayal, we naturally approach relationships cautiously. The Word of God establishes a firm foundation, enabling us to recognize and overcome our own biases that influence our interactions. It guides us in setting healthy boundaries with those who may pose a risk, while also providing instructions on cultivating meaningful connections with trustworthy individuals who support our personal growth.

2. Assume Positive Intent: What does it mean when Hebrews instructs us to let leaders lead with joy instead of groaning? As a parent, I find this to be true whenever I address an issue with my children. Will my child resent me forever? Am I repeating my parents' mistakes? This is the challenging task of leaders who are accountable to God. Husbands must confront their wives, even if it upsets them. Parents must address their children's mistakes to prevent future consequences. I'd rather have Sam or Ben sit on the stairs or miss out on video games for fighting while being mad at me than have them end up in jail as adults. Caring fathers discipline their children for their good, as mentioned in Hebrews 12:7-13. Confrontation is often uncomfortable for both leaders and those being led. Hebrews 13 reminds leaders to watch over the souls of those in their care.  
   
   Obsessing over the flaws in our leaders with a critical spirit makes it difficult for them -and others- to influence us when we need it the most. A critical spirit is not open to receiving feedback, and we thereby hinder our growth. Douglas Stones & Sheila Heen’s “Thanks for the Feedback” book discusses that feedback rarely comes at a convenient time, when we’re in the mood, and with perfect delivery. Understand that feedback -even your feedback to others - rarely comes at a convenient time or with flawless delivery. Think hard about what needs correction. Oftentimes, we lose out on growth opportunities by nitpicking non-gospel issues rather than focusing on what was done right with positive intent to encourage others to love and good works.

3. Remember your identity: Scripture is replete with references to our own identity, yet in our highly individualized society, we often overlook that we are an integral part of the body of Christ (1 Cor. 12:27, Rom 12:4-5). As members of Christ’s body, we are called to collaborate, not compete. This principle holds in any organizational structure, nation, business, family, or local church. We must carefully consider whether our actions will uplift or undermine the family we belong to. God has intricately designed our bodies so that there may be no division but rather a genuine concern for one another. When one member suffers, we all share in the pain; when one member is honored, we all rejoice together (1 Cor 12: 24-26).
   
   It is tempting to place ourselves at the forefront, passing judgment and scrutinizing those in authority over us, neglecting that Christ is the ultimate head to whom our leaders are accountable. The same holds for parents, managers, kings, and chiefs (Psalm 110). In the end, all will bow before the authority of Christ. Therefore, let us focus on building up the body of Christ, seeking ways to draw closer to God, remaining steadfast in our confession, and inspiring one another to love and do good deeds (Hebrews 10:19-25). Let's consider how we encourage our leaders, considering the weight of their responsibilities and utilizing the unique gifts bestowed upon us by God to identify and meet the needs of the body.

4. Quickly cover or confront in grace: When emotions are intense, we often struggle with how to respond. In session 3 of No Mere Mortals (our Summer Study for Adults in 2022) titled "Taking out the Garbage," Toby Sumpter explored the application of Scripture's teachings on addressing sin. The Bible urges us to either confront sin with grace, as described in Matthew 18:15-19 or extend forgiveness and cover sin, as outlined in Matthew 18:20-35. This calls for swift, gracious action, even before approaching God in worship, as emphasized in Matthew 5:23-24. Hebrews 12:14 reminds us to pursue peace with everyone, which can be challenging when we harbor doubt or hold onto past hurts.
   
   Covering with love a perceived offense requires relinquishing our desire for immediate justice or acknowledging that the issue may not be as significant as we initially thought. On the other hand, confronting the issue in love may involve risking a relationship for the greater good. We don't have the luxury of indefinitely delaying this decision, nor can we separate ourselves from those God has placed in our lives. Doing so not only drains our energy and hinders our ability to serve effectively in our divine calling and fosters division.
   
   Obeying leaders can be quite a struggle, right? We've all fallen for the Deceiver's tricks with his "Did God really say..." lie. But here's the thing: don't let Satan fool you into putting your logic, ideas, or feelings above God's truth. Trust me; it's a trap that humanity has fallen into time and time again. And you know what that leads to? Wasted gifts and anxiety, not just for you, but for those around you too - your kids, spouse, friends, and even your managers and elders.
   
   So, if you're grappling with this (like I often do), don't be afraid to seek guidance from the leaders God has placed in your life. They're there for a reason - to help restore what's broken and point you toward God's truth. And hey, finding a Godly discipler wouldn't hurt either. A local church member skilled in discipleship can help you navigate life's twists and turns while staying true to God's word.
   
   I know discipline can be tough. But as my parents always reminded me, it's the key to yielding righteous fruit in the long run. So, embrace discipline, patience, and grace as you journey to win the race. Grow within the body of Christ and let your gifts shine, all to the glory of God!

   -Jon Hietbrink, Northbridge Elder for Families